While it is true that I'm impatient, all my impatience doesn't move The Almighty one little bit. For a long time, I was afraid to show my impatience for fear that it would be seen as a lack of faith. It's not that I don't have faith, it's just that I sometimes have to sneak a peak into the oven to make sure that the cake is in there. I'm so afraid that if I don't peak, I'll forget about the party and miss the cake all together.
I really don't think the The Big Baker minds if I sneak a peak; sometimes I'm even asked to watch the cupcakes for a while. Of course, if I peak too often the cake will fall, and if I get distracted for too long, the cake might burn. Sometimes The Big Baker will let me vary the recipes just to give me a sense of participation. I know The Big Baker will always start a new batch if I don't succeed in my small part.
I just never know when I'll get to be the birthday girl, so I always try to have my party hat close by; and I really like to be the one to help with the birthday cakes. This makes me feel more sure that I won't miss my own party when my time comes.
The parties I most remember are the ones planned just for me, my tenth and my fiftieth. I love planning parties for other people because it makes me feel part of the celebration of their spirits. While I'm waiting for my Party Into Paradise, I feel honored to be part of the creation celebrations of others.