Wednesday, October 20, 2010

A Need for Nit Pickers

I'm always amused by the different approaches that people have to solving everyday issues. I usually hate power tools because of all the noise they make, but for de-leafing the deck, it sure is easier to blow than sweep. Richard, who normally loves power simply sweeps, which I don't understand because our joke about Richard is that if he was an obstetrician he'd deliver babies with a router.

The single father that I knew may not even own a mop, as he slides along the floors with a wet towel under foot. (Of course, now that someone has invented a power mop, he may have changed his ways.) Every other cleaning task requires either a leaf blower, vacuum cleaner, or pressure washer, all with powerful motors that make lots of boy noises. And we wonder why our men can't hear anything we say?

Fred has confessed to vacuuming the leaves that invade his home and returning them to their natural habitat, while I without thinking dumped my swept-up fall treasures into the garbage can. I saved on power, but increased the landfill load. Who is more sensitive to our environment?

Now, I've heard of a dad that had a few novel ways to combat his child's head lice. While I'm pretty sure that my daughter's father would have shaved my daughter's head, this dad went all out to save his darling daughter's hair while exterminating the offending critters.

This didn't, however, happen as his first response to the crisis. As any good dad would do upon being alerted that his princess has creepy crawlies, he sprang into action on the internet. The result was a detailed list of instructions for what the mother of his child should do to solve the problem. Upon being informed that this was to be a joint effort, he did the next best thing: attempted to locate a service that one could hire to do the dirty deed. His wife is still laughing at the idea that one can open the phone book and find a service called "Nit Pickers."

The parents discussed wrapping the flowing locks of their precious princess in a garbage bag and setting off a bug bomb, but thought better of it, as it may exterminate more than the insects. When none of these ideas bore fruit, our hero bought an armload of weapons of nit destruction; one of the items being a taser comb. Who knew that their were power combs on the market that would electrocute head lice?

Problem solved, and one more business opportunity for an intrepid entrepreneur in the current job market: "Nit Pickers, Inc." anyone?