Monday, July 18, 2011

Watching and Sharing Wisdom

I have often said that we don't know whether we've succeeded in parenting
Until we observe the parenting skills of our grown offspring.
What has happened to the elders? Many want to be eternally young.
I am proud of my grandparenting, though the glories may never be sung.

Their are many lessons that can only be learned by living every day,
Because every child is unique in so many different ways.
I've never liked the know-it-all grandparents who have nothing to learn;
We like to support and learn from the young parents as they take their turns.

We do like to pass on survival skills because we want our grandchildren to be
From the tyranny of those who pretend to know it all, forever be free.
We stay at the ready to step in when we are called to teach or assist,
But we believe that help is only welcomed when we allow ourselves to be missed.

I also have never gotten used to grandparents who buy and buy;
It seems to me that this creates children who won't even want to try.
I share my time listening and also teach them things I know,
Like how to make lasagna and put on their own talent show.

I don't think we can be too careful with the family that we choose;
I have only a friend or two who, I think, share my basic values.
These are the people I like to ask about their home rituals and rules,
And add their wisdom to the experiences we use as our grandparenting tools.

My nephew and his wife are expecting a baby, my sister's first grandchild;
I have been anticipating this event for more than a little while.
I don't know that my sister and I can ever see eye-to-eye,
But a relationship based on shared wisdom, I would at least like to try.

Time spent watching her son parent while she dotes on the new little boy
Is something that, I think, would bring us great amounts of joy.
I have heard so many stories of the Cajun fais-do-do
A community dance where even the youngest children were invited to go.

I suspect that there was much drinking, but probably only by the men,
As the women folk were expected to, all the children's needs, attend.
I'd like to have a version of this concept that is g-rated,
Were everyone shares in the joy and laughter that is, by the children, created.

There are many things to which children don't need to be exposed;
The adults who want to show how cool they are create many family woes.
The parents, aunts, uncles, and grandparents should keep a watchful eye
To make sure the children aren't being led astray by those who may try.

I think that it would be wonderful to watch the new generation of women and men
Sharing parenting responsibilities and truly being partners and friends.
The old folks could sit and wait for a baby to be tired out and need a lap,
Or for a teen to need some boundaries or knowledge that they naturally lack.

My youngest grandchild is a pre-teen, my oldest getting ready for college.
When I was having babies, my friends were acquiring knowledge.
Sometimes it just gets lonely being a granny by myself;
It is nice when I get to share this part of me with someone else.


  1. I'm glad you have the skills to share what you've learned and pass it on to others.

  2. Lots of love here and some very good philosophy.
    Yes, as you said, some of the elders want to 'appear' eternally young. But no matter when we accept it, Life is good!!!
    Love this
    From North Carolina